NFL Predictions: Sean Salisbury vs. A Plant

Football fans are on the edge of their seats because this is conference championship weekend. Sunday will decide which two teams go home and which two will advance to Super Bowl XLII. To get us ready with a little in-depth analysis, we present a point-counterpoint debate between ESPN analyst Sean Salisbury and a potted plant.

Gentlemen, let’s begin with the AFC where the San Diego Chargers travel to face the unbeaten New England Patriots. Who will win?

Potted Plant: While it might make for some dramatic television to see the upset of the century, I’m afraid the Bolts are too overmatched in this game. Look for the score to remain close in the first half, but then Tom Brady will take over the game and the Pats will roll to a 30-17 victory.

Sean Salisbury: ME SEAN SALISBURY AND ME TALK LOUD! ME TALK LOUDER THAN PLANT! PLANT IS DUMB! PLANT NO PLAY IN FOOTBALL LEAGUE! ME PLAY QUARTERBACK! ME BEST KNOW FOOTBALL, NOT PLANT! PLANT IS STUPID!

Um, alright then, how about we move on to the NFC where we have the New York Giants playing on the road against the Green Bay Packers. Which team do you see advancing to the Super Bowl?

Potted Plant: The Giants are playing some of their best football of the season, giving their fans a lot of hope for a conference title, but the Packers have too much firepower on offense and a pretty good defense to boot. Should be a great game up at Lambeau Field, but Green Bay gets the win by 10 points.

Sean Salisbury: DUMB PLANT! YOU NO HAVE BRAIN! ME SEAN SALISBURY, NFL QUARTERBACK, ME KNOW FOOTBALL! PLANT IS GREEN AND STUPID! HAHAHA! ME HATE PLANT!

Well that about wraps it up. Thank you both for your insight and enlightenment.

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