oddsnark | The Hired

The Hired

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Fresh Meat For Snyder: Jim Zorn

By oddJoe ⋅ February 10, 2008 ⋅ Post a comment

After holding Redskins fans hostage in suspense for over a month, Dan Snyder’s private plane made one last trip and finally delivered a new head coach: Jim Zorn.
Oh, well obviously Jim Zorn would get the job, I mean heck he was at the top of everyone’s short list, right? Or to put it another way, […]

If Mike Holmgren Is The Walrus, Does That Make Jim Mora The Eggman?

By GibbyZee ⋅ February 6, 2008 ⋅ Post a comment

The Seattle Seahawks plan to announce today their succession plan for when coach Mike Holmgren leave after the 2008 season, and those plans involve former Atlanta Falcons coach Jim Mora.
Mora, if you’ll remember, coached the Falcons for four seasons, taking the team to the NFC Championship game against Philadelphia in 2004. It was all downhill […]

Nolan Ryan Won’t Save The Rangers Either

By GibbyZee ⋅ February 6, 2008 ⋅ Post a comment

Let’s say you’re a Texas Rangers fan. I know, it’s pretty unlikely even if you live in Dallas, but let’s say you are. And you’ve been waiting for like forever for your team to show some sign of competitiveness — 1999 the Rangers have had just one winning season. So is it good news that […]

Guy You’ve Never Heard Of Hired To Coach Team You Don’t Care About

By oddJoe ⋅ January 19, 2008 ⋅ Post a comment

Anyone here ever heard of John Harbaugh?

The ageless Brad Johnson train rolls into Dallas

By GibbyZee ⋅ March 6, 2007 ⋅ Post a comment

If they ever build a Hall of Fame for journeymen NFL quarterbacks, Brad Johnson should be the very first inductee. The guy has logged more miles around the league in 15 seasons than Lance Armstrong tooling around France on his bike all those years. Well, that legacy opens a new chapter today because Johnson has […]

Petrino (May He Rest in Peace) To Coach Dirty Birds

By oddSeth ⋅ January 8, 2007 ⋅ Post a comment

Bobby Petrino’s decision to accept the head coaching job for the Atlanta Falcons had rippling effects across not only the NFL but dead pools as well, with Petrino suddenly replacing Fidel Castro on many lists as the celebrity most likely to die in the upcoming year.
When it was explained to dead pool participants that Michael […]

Cowher Out in Pittsburgh; Cowher’s Jaw to Take Over Head Coaching Duties

By oddSeth ⋅ January 6, 2007 ⋅ Post a comment

The Pittsburgh Steelers announced yesterday that head coach Bill Cowher was resigning after 15 seasons at the helm.
According to Cowher: “I’m not burned out. There comes a time in your life — I’m healthy and happy, and I’ve been fortunate — you’ve got to prioritize things. My family has made a lot of sacrifices for […]

New England Now Hiring

By oddRyan ⋅ October 11, 2006 ⋅ Post a comment

Successful, profitable National Football League franchise seeks athletic-minded males for positions. Openings at defensive back, linebacker, defensive line, and wide receiver. Must be able to run and handle a football. Ability to multitask a plus. Part-time to start with opportunity for full-time employment. Socks will be provided to new hires. EOE.
Respond to:
One Patriot […]

Raiders Continue Head Coaching Shell Game

By oddSeth ⋅ February 11, 2006 ⋅ Post a comment

Since every able-bodied white male seem to be currently gainfully employed, the Raiders finally gave up on Saturday and announced that they were hiring Art Shell for his second stint as head coach.
Art seems a nice enough guy, but he hasn’t been a head coach since, umm, the Raiders canned him back in 1994. He […]

Hail Yale! Bills Hire Jauron

By oddJoe ⋅ January 23, 2006 ⋅ Post a comment

The Buffalo Bills have hired Dick Jauron as their newest head coach, replacing Mike Mularkey who resigned ten days ago. Jauron reportedly wowed owner Ralph Wilson and new general manager Marv Levy with his impressive resume, ie he’s from an Ivy League school. Either that or the Bills are in such bad shape that the […]