oddsnark » New Orleans Hornets

Dirty Ref League Vows Help For New Orleans

oddJoe — Thu, 01 Nov 2007 11:01:39 +0000

Just hours before the Hornets beat Sacramento 104-90 to mark the start of their first full season back in New Orleans after the devastation of Hurricane Katrina, NBA commissioner David Stern committed his league to helping the struggling city to rebuild.

“This is going to be a season-long, league-wide effort that is going to involve the entire NBA family,” he told an audience at a local gymnasium.

*Stern went on to say:

“But you people gotta start buying tickets to these games here. I don’t have to tell you George Shinn is an utter and complete bastard and if some of these games don’t sell out, he’s sure as shit going to move the Hornets to Oklahoma City. Unless of course that other douchebag Clay Bennett beats him to it. Don’t underestimate that sack of crap, I mean court ruling or no, he’ll just move that damn team in the middle of the night if he has to.

“So what I’m tell you people is, what I’m asking here, is just buy some damn Hornets tickets. Please. It’s for the children.”

*Some quotes may not be 100% accurate.

George Shinn Says New Orleans Better Start Praying

oddJoe — Thu, 27 Jul 2006 11:31:04 +0000

It’s all up to you, New Orleans. If you’re good enough in the eyes of the Almighty, you might just get to keep your basketball team. Speaking to reporters about the ultimate fate of the New Orleans Hornets and its relationship with the disaster plagued city, team owner George Shinn said, “I’m just at total peace that whatever happens, it’s going to be God’s will.” So the decision as to whether or not the Hornets stay in the Big Easy or move elsewhere is out of your hands now, right George? It’s all up to God. What a piece of work. A few months ago Shinn all but flipped the bird at the city and threatened to move if they didn’t build a new practice center for the Hornets, and now he’s “seen a lot of improvement” in the situation but in the end it’s all up to the fates and the four winds to decide. Well, maybe the good people of New Orleans, the sports fans anyway, should pray for deliverance from the tyranny of George Shinn.

Hornets To New Orleans: Suck It Up!

oddJoe — Sun, 14 May 2006 03:49:26 +0000

With Louisiana and the city of New Orleans slowly recovering from the devastating effects of last year’s Hurricane Katrina, you’d think this might be a good time for a local sports franchise to do something magnanimous. Maybe something like giving free tickets to those people displaced by the storm and resulting floods or a charity ball game. Apparently, though, the New Orleans Hornets have a much different definition of magnanimous: The other day, a lawyer for Hornets owner George Shinn basically told a group of prospective local investors that the team would move if the city didn’t come through on an agreement to build a practice facility next to New Orleans Arena.

So, let’s get this straight, city agrees to build practice facility, then said city is practically wiped off the face of the earth by a monster hurricane and everyone has to be relocated to Houston or Detroit or some other God foresaken place, and now you’re going to hold their feet to the fire on this measly little thing? Nice move. In other Hornets news, Shinn has asked for an exemption from slavery laws so he can import child laborers from Southeast Asia to stoke the boiler fires of his ocean-going yacht.