Other Stuff Barry Bonds and Oscar Wilde Have in Common

Barry Bonds is apparently suing the guys who wrote that book. Oscar Wilde sued a guy who said he was gay. So, Bonds and Wilde have that in common; they both sued guys who said something that was demonstrably clear to anyone with eyes and/or ears. The perhaps startling discovery is that, upon further research, […]

Racketeering: The Australian Open Semis

Good gosh almighty, who the hell is Marcos Baghdatis and just what is a Cypriot? David Nalbandian found out on Thursday when Baghdatis came from 2 sets down to upset the reigning Master’s Cup champion and 4 seed. Nalbandian started out on fire winning the 1st set and up 5-1 in the 2nd before Baghdatis […]

Artest Trade Back On

Today’s iteration of Ron Artest’s personality has decided that Sacramento is not such a bad place afterall, according to Jim Gray, who managed to climb out of Kobe’s lap for the second day in a row.

Breaking News: Crazy-assed Player Still Crazy

oddSeth called for it, and it looked like it had happened a mere 5 hours later. But then Ron Artest recalled that he was batassed crazy and decided to rip shit up.
Jim Gray of ESPN, taking a break from napping in Kobe’s lap, had reported that the long held-up Artest trade had finally gone down, […]

Racketeering: The Australian Open Quarterfinals

Hey, Everybody, it’s the WTA: hot women playing ugly tennis! Who doesn’t like that?

Hot Russian Blondes Maria Sharapova and Nadia Petrova played a Godawfully ugly 1st set of tennis in Tuesday’s quarterfinals match, which Sharapova won 7-6(8-6), 6-4. She won the 1st set despite being down 4-6 in the breaker. It’s a lot easier to […]

Racketeering: Week 1 at the Australian Open

Man alive, was it ever a bad idea for Andy Roddick to tempt fate with that American Express ad campaign about losing his Mojo? Promptly bumped off at last summer’s US Open shortly after the commercials debuted, Roddick was hoping for better in Melbourne.
And it seemed set up for it too. Defending champion Marat Safin, […]

Franco’s Divided Loyalties

Get ready, America, for the story sure to be pounded into us for the next 2 weeks by ESPN, ABC, and everyone else in the Sports Media who likes to beat a dead horse: Who will legendary Seahawk running back Franco Harris side with in Super Bowl 40?
Harris — who started his 13-year career with […]

Theo and the Sox Are Totally Getting Back Together!!!

Did ya hear the news? Theo Epstein and the Red Sox are supposably getting back together and are totally acting like it’s no big deal. ESPN.com told me that the AP told them that Sox management and Theo slipped a note to them after everyone had already gone home for the day.
Like no one […]

Brandon Kirsch Mistakenly Enters NFL Draft

Purdue quarterback Brandon Kirsch has given up his remaining year of eligibility and accidentally entered his name for the NFL Draft. Though a senior Kirsch played in just 3 games as a back up in 2003 and could have come back for another year. His stats for 2005 included 7 touchdowns, 8 interceptions, 1,700 yards, […]

Mularkey Sees Writing on the Wall, Eventually

Bills coach Mike Mularkey has submitted his resignation to owner Ralph Wilson, a move that comes 8 days after President and GM Tom Donahoe was fired and 6 days after 5 of his assistants were also let go. Among the assistants fired were offensive coordinator Tom Clements and the entire defensive staff except coordinator Jerry […]