NFL • New York Giants

Umm, Strahan, I’m Not a Lawyer But I Don’t Think That’ll Work

Michael Strahan has been ordered to pay his ex-wife Jean Strahan $15.3 million as part of their divorce proceedings, which works out to 50% of their net assets plus 20% of his salary during each year they were married. How did they judge arrive at that specific figure? Well, it was pretty simple, as the couple had signed a pre-nup agreeing to those very terms.

Strahan had been contesting the total amount he owed, with his lawyer conjuring up the unique legal argument that since Strahan’s ex-wife never asked for the 20% of his salary, each and every year, he shouldn’t have to pay it to her.

Nice try, but, umm, yeah, that’s kind of eaten up with dumbassery, all the way around. Not only does signing the pre-nup pretty much doom you to actually complying with whatever is in their, due to that whole legal binding contract thing, but I’m not sure the whole but-the-ho-didn’t-ask-for-the-money-each-year argument has ever held up in a court of law.

If you get audited and it turns out you owe the IRS back taxes you don’t exactly get to say: “Whoa, beeyatch, you have to ask me for your money each and every year or else you don’t get it.”

Time to get a new lawyer, Mike. I’ll work for 1/10th of what he or she has been charging you and, despite the lack of a law degree, I guarantee I’ll do at least as poor a job. Deal?

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