NBA

Pacers Surprised that Crazy Person Says Something Crazy

Crazy-ass Ron Artest thinks it’d be best if the Indaiana Pacers traded him, preferably to his hometown New York Knicks. Artest talked to the Indianapolis Star on Saturday and said a lot of crazy things, many of them directly contradicting the crazy things he had said only moments before.

Team President and father figure Donnie Walsh expressed surprise: “He can always come up and talk to me or Larry Bird,” Walsh said. “From here on out, I expect Ronnie to be a professional. . . . (This) isn’t the best way to get a trade done.”

Why does Crazy Ronnie want a trade? It’s all very logical: “I’m so demanding of the ball. It’s not my fault,” he said. “Every time somebody is on me it’s a mismatch. It messes up the offense. I like Coach (Carlisle) as a person, but I don’t like playing for Coach. I like my team, though.”

I just ask that, please, NBA Gods, let this trade to the Knicks happen.

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